Conversation that I had tonight with Alex through the bathroom door.

Alex: Dad!!!

10 seconds later.

Alex: Dad!!!!

Me: I’m coming hang on.

I get to the bathroom

Me: What?

Alex: Can you get me a new roll of toilet paper, we ran out.

Me: Ah, no, we don’t have any left.

Alex: But what am I supposed to do?

Me: Use your hand, just wash it off when you get out.

With absolute horror in his voice

Alex: But, but, ….. but, I’ve gone….

That’s when I let him off the hook and opened the door and threw him a new roll.